IX. Hair, There & Everywhere!

Hair, Hair, Hair. My hair basically ruled my world since I can remember. I would wake up at 5 AM in high school just to shower, blow dry, and straighten my hair EVERY morning (talk about damaging!). My mom has really curly hair, well I should say had. My mom and I both jumped on the hair straightening bandwagon back in the early 2000's (me when I was in 7th grade and my mom when she was, let's say 40's). Needless to say, the repeated 365 days of 365°F heat pretty much ruined our wavy locks.

From 7th grade on, I was left with frizzy, dry, but somewhat manageable hair. Long story short, my hair and I have always had an arduous relationship. Maybe this is the reason that when I began to lose it, I was surprisingly unphased.

My first treatment was on Friday, April 19th. The following week I frantically looked for any sign of extreme or noticeable hair loss. Nothing. Sure, there was some hair in the shower drain and a few strands on my pillow case, but that was pretty typical. Regardless of this, before my second treatment I chose to cut my hair. I didn't get a drastic cut, just a simple lob (long bob). I actually really liked it! It was quick to wash and super easy to style. Unfortunately, this haircut didn't last long. My next treatment was on May 3rd, and shortly after this I began to notice hair loss. It wasn't drastic though. It was actually very slow and subtle. Each morning when I woke up I would notice 5-10 strands on my pillow case. I noticed hair shedding onto my clothes, and small clumps pooled up in the shower drain. I wasn't too alarmed, until one night after I got out of the shower and combed my hair. OH BOY! Hair, there, and EVERYWHERE!! The more I combed, the more fell out. I was convinced that if I kept combing I would be bald by the end of the night.

The next morning I told my family I wanted to shave my head. I sent out a text in our family group chat and invited all to "Becca's Buzz Cut". I told my family that it was going to be a celebratory gathering (no crying allowed!). In fact, it actually turned out to be quite the party! My boyfriend shaved my head, my mom took pictures, my dad cracked jokes, and I sent hilarious Snapchats to my sister showing off my new duo (all while blasting Sinead O'Connor of course)!

While everyone's choice is different (and there is no right or wrong), I am so happy with the decision I made. When I was younger, I let my hair rule me. I worked so hard to make it perfect and tame what I was naturally given. Losing my hair helped me realize that hair (and other superficial characteristics) do not define who we are. I am the same Rebecca I was before losing my hair as I am now. Actually, I think I may be slightly improved. Definitely more confident, and so very thankful for all the things I still have and am able to do. Cancer may take away hair, but it can never take away who we are!